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Tuesday, April 24, 2012

For My Sleepless New Neighbor, Princess AndthePea

Who asked me to take down my one wind chime that has hung on the back patio for thirteen years. And for myself who has been so annoyed at her chutzpah (nerve) and my immediate compliance with her request that I have become an asshole too. It's not a cowbell. It's an artisan chime hung thirty three feet or more away from her unit in a sheltered spot and only tinkles when the wind velocity exceeds 45 mph. Its seldom heard decibles are immesurable. It brings good che.  Excuse me. I have to go practice my piano finger exercises; it's seven AM.




THANK YOU ALL FOR YOUR SUPPORT. IT BOLSTERED MY CONVICTIONS. I HUNG THE CHIMES BACK WHERE THEY BELONG; MY CHI CAME BACK; MY HOUSE WAS IN ORDER. I SAT DOWN AND WARMED UP FOR MY PORTRAIT SESSION.





First Corn; watercolor  on Reeves; 6" x 8"

28 comments:

  1. May her ear-holes turn to assholes and sh*t all over her shoulders!

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    1. YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am so sorry answered the door last Saturday. And she kept saying, You're mad at me aren't you. I said I don't like you very much, but I'm not mad--yet. From your mouth John to her overly sensitive auditory system. I wonder how she's going to take the AC compressors just fifteen feet away from her BR window?

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  2. Great way to start my day, with a laugh and morning coffee. Still laughing over John S. comment. Thanks for sharing.

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  3. Oh dear. . . sorry about the new neighbor.

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    1. Your sorry. I'm sorry. And the sorriest thing of all was when I was talking to another neighbor who has a wind chime (one also)and told her the request and she said "oh ya, I heard about that." This new bitch was out complaining in the neighborhood before she ever came to my door. Well, I'm going to treat the chimes like the flag: raise them at sunrise (do you think I need a bugle) and lower them at sunset--until I forget.

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    2. Glad they are back up and all is right again.

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  4. omg... is it written anywhere in your CCR's that u can;t have wind chimes? your neighbor would send a warrant out for me cuz, I have one hung from various trees... I hate to say this, but the fact that u took it down means she can bitch about anything you or anyone else does... I would put that chime back up and see where it goes from there... In our association you have to have at least 2 people complain... Research it, I bet you have a leg to stand on on this..also does she have a history of being the neighborhood biatch?

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    1. No--nor are wind chimes with decibels way below the decibels of a car going 65mph, mentioned in the the township's codes for keeping the public's peace because the decibels are way below 75dcbs and immeasurable. Actually, I'm on my way to put them back when they have been these last thirteen years. This has been too upsetting to me, and I'm sorry I agreed so readily to be a nice guy. I'm taking it back. Then on Sunday she sends me a Thank you Note for her good night's sleep. I hadn't taken them down yet!

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    2. In all honesty, I would of been so shocked by the request I would of taken them down... btw are the chimes from New Mexico? you mentioned they're an artist's so I naturally thought of Palos Solari... My MIL gave me one of his and I love it.

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  5. btw, I would play this song on your stereo and blare it from your windows.. maybe she would get the hint? LOL

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    1. Now Chris, that would just be too nasty and against the city's codes. Better to e-mail it to her. LOL.

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  6. At least she doesn't fire up her diesel truck at 6AM to drive her horse trailer past your bedroom window. And no, I haven't spoken to her in years, and neither has most of the rest of the neighborhood. Every neighborhood has one!!!

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    1. Kathryn you're terrific. I dry cleaner used to live next-door when I was a kid. He'd fire up his van right under my window. I'd roll over and go to back to sleep. His son was a knock out. Didn't want to fight that one.LOL

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  7. My feeling is that since she is new in the neighborhood she is sensitive to sounds. Soon she won't hear them all. Visitors to our house sometimes comment on the train that passes nearby. "What train?" we ask. Screw her.

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    1. See, that's where her complaint falls apart. She has lived here one year. The chimes were here when she moved in last spring. What took her so long? Why hasn't she complained about the AC compressor under her window? The chimes are back where they belong, my chi is back, Honey is talking to me again. My house is in order. I can paint. --She did move to this condo, closer living quarters, from a house, larger living quarters. So she just hasn't adjusted yet to the tinkle of condo living. LOL.

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    1. Yes he did Casey. My son told me about this song when I told him my sad tale of woe. I thought it was appropriate. We're all confronted by assholes every now and then, who, unfortunately, make us behave as assholes. if Jimmy wrote a song, I guess I should have just painted one.

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  9. Your neighbor would have really hated a duplex where I lived some years ago....youngsters routinely rode their "hot wheels" on our parking lot and when my sliding glass door was open I couldn't hear a thing when the suckers "drove by". I'd be watching a murder mystery and the narrator would say "the killer was gggggddddddddddddd" (hot wheels noise). I complained to the management and they more or less told me that I was a kid-hater, which is patently untrue. ANYWAY, I feel sure that your complainer will get over it and deal with it. What a baby!
    I'm learning more and more in life that everyone demands to be right all the time. Not much room for dialog!

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    1. Celeste with this airing of my laundry in public, the marvelous piano practice I had early this morning and the chimes back where they belong, I'm done. I know all there is to know about the township codes, if I need to recite them. I'm fine. The chimes are fine. If she comes back I'm going to recommend ear plugs or a white noise machine. The waves of the ocean washing against the shore is quite relaxing and puts me right to sleep. She should try it.

      I don't think it's a matter of being right. It's a matter of tolerance. My kid had a big wheel. He loved it. I thought it was noisy too. I couldn't hear my wind chimes over his racket!LOL

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  10. You could try playing a xylophone ... or dressing up like a witch and scaring her.

    When my granddaughter was about six, Pat and her dressed up as witches, for Halloween night. Just before they went out, a bunch of Trick or Treaters knocked on the door. Well this old house can seem a bit scary to kids at night, but even more so when two witches opened the door. The kids ran off screaming ... we have never had trick or treats since! There's a similar story about Christmas carolers ... another time perhaps!

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    1. I was a witch for many Halloweens scaring quite a few children in the neighborhood. I went all out with recordings of snarling dogs and hideous laughter, totally dark house, single blue light, scull candles, cob webs etc. Had the greatest witches hat and I'd rat my long hair out and powder it. Spent hours on green make up, sunken eyes and moles and warts. Plus I made my kids' costumes so they could wear them over their parkas. We started getting ready a month ahead. Halloween was a big deal at our house. Loved it. I miss it. Did it for a while with the grandkids, then they grew up. Now there's no trick or treats. Very sad. I can't pilfer any more double bubble gums from the kids' stash.

      I've already set up a scare for the neighbor. I put back the chimes. All I have to do is tell her they're back and sleepless nights will return to haunt her. Odd that she slept well Sunday night when she thought I had them down; Monday is when she left the thank you note for me complying with her wishes.

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  11. Ah shucks- she wouldn't last a day in my neighborhood!
    I think Dan had it right- once she acclimates to the place those little things won't bother her.

    Fabulous corn! I really love what you do with paint. Your artistic talent comes across in all mediums.

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  12. Neighbours aren't often easy, and as Kathryn says, there is always one ! In my summer house in Denmark where I normally go only in the summertime, I have neighbours that eliminated small trees and bushes from my garden because they 'disturbed' their eyes looking at them from their side, can you believe it ?! I called the administration and they told me to call the police which I did, the police had a 'talk' with them, and so far I find my new trees and bushes when I come back. You just keep keep your chimes...and BTW excellent ear props can be bought !

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    1. I am horrified Jane! I can't believe someone would cut down their neighbor's trees--I can't believe someone would cut down a healthy tree. But this situation is a bit different: my chimes are the culprit. They make noise. I am the bad guy for insisting upon having them--even though I've had them for years and they don't break any disturbing the peace ordinances. This is what is so disturbing to me. Before I answered the doorbell, I was a good guy about to take a nap. Now I'm a bad guy because I didn't keep my word. I took the chimes down, moved them to the front of the house, didn't like that the wind never rustled them once during the day, so moved them back. I also didn't care for the fact that she had complained to the neighbors about my noisy chimes (1 chime 21") and I had been the bad guy on the block for I don't know how long. I do know, I'm going to keep the title and the chimes. Call methe bad guy, then I'll be the bad guy. I wouldn't want to disappoint.

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  14. First I have to say I love the corn. And then I must add, that the nerve of some people never ceases to amaze me. I am so glad you put your chimes back (or never took them down, whichever). I am just childish enough (I'm 60 so maybe I'm entitled to a bit of it) to purchase another one and have chimes in stereo.

    xoxo

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