Tuesday, June 30, 2015

'Some Assembly Required'

Total Assembly Required

Every year I try to improve my studio facilities. This year I thought I'd add a bookcase to house the art books I like to keep within easy reach--like Ralph Mayer's The Artist's Materials, Itten's The Theory of Color, etc.  I went to The Shelving Store online and purchased a three tiered bookcase I could add additional three tiered units to if my collection of must have handy books expanded. I went to Amazon to send out a full length free standing mirror for observing reverse images of my paintings and perhaps doing full body self portraits. Both items seemed like  good ideas when  I clicked 'buy.'

The 'some assembly required' bookcase arrived first.  I figured  I'm handy with a screw driver, I could screw in whatever little parts where necessary; I had done this before.  I didn't figure on having to construct the whole thing till  twelve pieces of bookcase slide out of the box along with a little box filed with assorted screws and plates and the directions suggested an electric drill with a Philips screw bit would be .good along with an extra pair of hands.


Mug shot, my 2 hour portrait challenge
that will take four hours once my knee recovers.
I called up the stairs for Ellis.

 Reluctantly he came down, took one look at the pieces spread across the floor and told me I was on my own; I should have gone to Ikea.  "Fine," said this 'Little Red Hen,' I'll do it myself!"  And I sat on the floor to get started. "How hard could it be?"

 After screwing in just two support clips, I knew this project was going to take all summer.  I didn't have the strength I used to have, the proper tool, and sitting with legs folded on the floor was killing my already finicky right knee.  I turned off the lights and hobbled over for a glass of wine and my ice pack thinking what am  I going to do when the free standing mirror comes?

I am going to call my friend's handyman and pay him whatever he wants to get me out of this do it yourself crap. I have a painting on the easel!



Coincidently, this article was published in the Detroit News the day after my awakening.  While my knee still throbbed, I could still laugh.

 
You could read the rest of Mr. O'Connor's article  here.
 
 
 
 

12 comments:

  1. I think everyone has a story like this ... those dreaded 'kits'

    We must all be mad to finish off the final assembly for the manufacturer.

    I can imagine what IBM and Hewlitt Packard would have said if the products we had manufactured for them had been sent in a box with me saying ,'Just put it together yourself.

    There are people who have set up a business who sell their skills as kit-assemblers to people like you and me

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    1. I'm going to look for one of those. The maddening thing about this bookcase fiasco is the marks the manufacturer made designating where to screw in the clip screws were minute scratches through the finish instead of starter holes. Exactly where to install the screws was guesswork and of course that would have an effect on how level the shelves would be. As soon as the mirror arrives, I will set up a date with the handman.

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  2. I know how lucky I am, I don't have that problem! HeHeHeHe. I'll send Roy over, or you could move next door!

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  3. As my luck would have it, the standing mirror came today. I'm hiring my friend's handyman. He's got the right tools and the strength.

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  4. THIS is why I don't like buying stuff like that online... U never know if they give u enough parts or screws...I bet u could of found it locally..

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    1. We're ignoring these items right now. Maybe they'll magically disappear. :-))

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  5. I sympathize.

    Even with ikea, I'm a fan of hiring someone else to assemble.

    Your portrait is looking cool.

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    1. I made the call.

      Thanks. I was trying a new approach, which doesn't happen quickly.

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  6. oh my, this post had me nodding in agreement. I USED to be able to figure things out. The last time I tried that, however, I had to run screaming to my Mother's neighbor (a plumber) to please come help (there was water everywhere). Now, I just let things go---or I pay to have it done. It's too bad that we lose strength....very important for putting things together! Love where the portrait is going. Let us know what happens next with your project.

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    1. Working on it. It's nice to have a long weekend to give it a try before running to the handyman.

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